You might be physically sitting on the sofa, but mentally you're somewhere else entirely – thinking about tomorrow, worrying about something that happened yesterday or running through a hundred different scenarios in your head.
If this sounds familiar, you may be experiencing the effects of ongoing stress and anxiety.
The truth is, many of us have become so accustomed to feeling stressed that we no longer recognise what it feels like to properly switch off.
But living in a constant state of worry doesn't have to become your normal.
Why is it so difficult to switch off your mind?
Anxiety isn't always obvious. It doesn't necessarily mean having panic attacks or feeling frightened.
Sometimes anxiety looks like:
Constantly overthinking even the smallest decisions.
Feeling restless or unable to relax.
Waking up during the night with a racing mind.
Worrying about things that haven't happened.
Feeling responsible for everything and everyone.
Finding it difficult to concentrate.
Feeling irritable, overwhelmed or emotionally exhausted.
Always anticipating that something might go wrong.
Your mind may be trying to protect you by anticipating problems and preparing for every possible outcome.
However, when this becomes a habitual way of thinking, it can leave you feeling mentally and physically exhausted.
Understanding the stress and anxiety cycle
When we experience stress, our body activates its natural threat response. This can increase our heart rate, tense our muscles and make us more alert.
This response is useful when we need to deal with immediate danger. However, when our minds continually perceive potential threats, we can find ourselves feeling tense and on edge even when we're perfectly safe.
For example:
You receive an unexpected message from someone.
You start wondering whether something is wrong.
Your thoughts become increasingly negative.
You feel anxious and begin analysing the situation.
You struggle to concentrate on anything else.
Eventually, the original situation may turn out to be completely harmless, but you've already spent hours worrying about it.
This is how overthinking can feed anxiety, and anxiety can encourage even more overthinking.
The good news is that you can learn to interrupt this cycle.
5 ways to calm an anxious mind and reduce stress
1. Recognise when your thoughts are taking over
One of the first steps towards managing anxiety is becoming aware of your thinking patterns.
Ask yourself:
Is this thought based on something that's actually happening?
Am I imagining the worst possible outcome?
Am I worrying about something I cannot control?
What would I say to a friend who was thinking this way?
You don't have to believe every thought that enters your mind.
Learning to challenge unhelpful thinking patterns is an important part of cognitive behavioural techniques (CBT).
2. Stop trying to control everything
Sometimes anxiety is fuelled by the need to know what's going to happen.
We want certainty. We want reassurance. We want to know that everything will be okay.
But life doesn't always offer certainty.
Trying to control every outcome can create even more stress.
Instead, practise separating what you can control from what you cannot.
You can control how you respond, the boundaries you establish and the decisions you make.
You cannot control other people's behaviour, every future event or every possible outcome.
Learning to tolerate a little uncertainty can be surprisingly freeing.
3. Give your nervous system a chance to relax
When you're constantly busy, thinking and worrying, it's easy to forget that your body needs time to recover.
Try introducing small moments of calm into your day.
For example:
Take a gentle walk without looking at your phone.
Practise slow, comfortable breathing.
Stretch your body or try some gentle Pilates.
Spend a few minutes outside.
Listen to calming music.
Give yourself permission to do absolutely nothing.
You don't need to wait until you're exhausted to start looking after yourself.
Small, consistent changes can help you develop a healthier relationship with stress.
4. Change the way you respond to negative thoughts
Imagine you're lying in bed and suddenly remember something you said at work.
You start replaying the conversation, wondering whether you sounded silly or whether someone misunderstood you.
Before you know it, you're wide awake.
Rather than getting caught up in the thought, try acknowledging it:
"I'm worrying about something that has already happened. I don't need to solve it right now."
This may sound simple, but learning to create some distance between yourself and your thoughts can be incredibly helpful.
You are not your thoughts, and you don't have to act on every feeling they create.
5. Make time for yourself without feeling guilty
Many people spend so much time looking after other people, meeting expectations and managing responsibilities that their own emotional wellbeing becomes an afterthought.
You might feel guilty about resting, saying no or putting your own needs first.
But looking after yourself isn't selfish.
It is an essential part of maintaining emotional balance.
Start by asking yourself:
"What do I need today to feel calmer, healthier and more like myself?"
Sometimes the answer is a walk, a conversation, a little exercise or simply an earlier night.
How can hypnotherapy and coaching help with anxiety and stress?
Sometimes understanding why you're anxious isn't enough to change how you feel.
You may know that you're overthinking, recognise that your worries are disproportionate and still find yourself repeating the same patterns.
This is where a combination of coaching, cognitive behavioural techniques and hypnotherapy may be helpful.
As a qualified hypnotherapist and relationship and wellbeing coach, I work with clients to explore the thoughts, beliefs and behaviours that may be contributing to their stress and anxiety.
Coaching can help you understand your triggers, identify unhelpful patterns, develop practical coping strategies and build greater confidence in how you manage life's challenges.
Cognitive behavioural techniques can help you recognise and challenge negative thinking patterns, develop more balanced perspectives and change behaviours that maintain anxiety.
Hypnotherapy uses guided relaxation and focused attention to help you work with thoughts, feelings and patterns at a deeper level. It can be used as a complementary approach to support relaxation and positive change.
My approach is tailored to the individual. There isn't a one-size-fits-all solution, and you don't have to wait until you reach breaking point before seeking support.
If anxiety is persistent, severe or affecting your everyday life, it's also important to speak to your GP or seek appropriate mental health support.
You don't have to live in survival mode
Imagine waking up without immediately feeling overwhelmed by the day ahead.
Imagine being able to enjoy the present rather than constantly worrying about what might happen next.
Imagine feeling more confident, calmer and emotionally balanced.
This isn't about eliminating every negative thought or never experiencing stress again. That's not realistic.
It's about learning to respond differently, developing healthier patterns and giving yourself the tools to navigate life with greater ease.
You deserve to feel comfortable in your own mind.
Ready to feel calmer and more in control?
If you're struggling with anxiety, stress or overthinking, I'd love to help you explore how coaching and hypnotherapy could support you.
I offer personalised coaching and hypnotherapy to help men and women build confidence, improve emotional wellbeing and create lasting positive changes.
Whether you want to reduce anxiety, manage stress, improve self-esteem or simply feel more like yourself again, taking that first step can make a difference.
Contact Jo Barnett today to find out more about coaching and hypnotherapy.
Lets get stronger together.
Visit: www.jobarnett.com
Jo Barnett – Coaching, CBT techniques & Hypnotherapy
Heal • Grow • Thrive
